My heart's desire

My heart's desire. Is often not what it should be. I find myself saying that my heart's desire is to live in the country. I miss the sunsets and birds and quietness of a rural home. I truly enjoy being outside as do my children and husband. Is it wrong then for me to hope for such a thing again? Does God give us desires like a heart for country living? Or is that a selfish one? I am often not sure. I do know that I have a deep longing for fresh country air and space to walk and breathe and room for animals and children to run and play and dig and climb and explore. God created the beautiful world around us and I think its only natural for us to be drawn to the Creator as we observe and enjoy His beautiful creation. I must guard my heart though, I don't wish to worship the creation more than the Creator. I don't wish to make an idol out of my desire to live in the country once again. I just know that my heart is so drawn to it. I know my words may sound conflicting. These are the crazy thoughts going through my head and it helps me to sort it out as I write about it all.

Well we recently got to go see the house we have been wanting to buy for two years. The couple who own it invited us to come and see if its what we want. We were so at peace while we were there, just breathing it all in. The house is a bit smaller than what we currently live in, but it is bigger in the living and kitchen areas for entertaining. We have a hard time fitting many more into our current home, because the dining and living areas are so small. This home has all the things we want. A covered patio, enclosed garage for extra bedroom/play/school area, huge back yard, room for a garden, TREES!!!, a small pond and barns including a chicken coop on one. It is so peaceful and quiet. We would have room for all the critters we want and room for kids and more kids and friends and family. It would be such an incredible blessing should the Lord allow us to buy this property and move there. My husband and I both looked at each other and said, I could spend the rest of my life here, Lord willing. We have lived in 10 different homes (one twice) over the past 20 years of marriage. Needless to say, we are tired of moving and ready to own our forever home. (Lord willing) I am just so afraid to really hope for it, for fear it will dissolve into a vapor. I find myself wanting it so badly that I am afraid it will be all for naught. I must focus on the Lord and take my eyes of worldly treasures and realize that He knows my heart and also knows whats best for me and my family. This does give me peace.

Well, so for now we are on to the not-so-fun part of once again trying to declutter/deep clean my house. Trying to prepare it for showing to potential buyers. That is my first real fear, are there any potential buyers in this market? This is not a good time to be wanting to sell a home. I would be so grateful to just get out from under it, I don't expect to make a dime, just pay off the loan and move on! I have a few contacts who may know some investors. I will try that first, hoping to avoid having to show my house. As I stated on an earlier post, I hate being called with an hour notice, when we live in our house 24/7 with 4 kids and sometimes up to 3 extra on any given day, that is just ludicrous to expect a perfect home for showing with such short notice. UGH! I hate thinking about it again. However, it will be worth it in the end if we can sell and buy our dream home!

I know that even in an economy like this one, that nothing is impossible with God. We had previously sold our 10 year old doublewide on 15 acres in the middle of no-where farming community an hour's drive from any major cities. When the Lord lead us to put it up for sale we had it on the market and it sold in only 2 months time. The buyer paid full asking price and didn't even do an inspection! That was totally a divine intervention! There is no way I could have expected such a quick success so I know it is only the Lord's hand on us. So I am praying for a second dose of God's great Grace! I am worried I sound greedy. I don't mean to say that I expect it, I am just praying and hoping He'll choose to bless us again. Maybe not in the exact same way but I know that if we are able to sell our house in this market that it will be only from the hands of my Heavenly Father!

So if your reading this please lift us up in prayer. Pray for wisdom in all the decisions we must make as well as guidance about the decision to buy(should we sell our home). Thank you.